It's not always easy to parent an adopted child. The lying, the stealing, wanting to go their own way. Some days are easier than others. Mark and I are always looking to educate ourselves on how to help our adopted kids. We went to an adoption seminar this last week. It was great to hear confirmation on the things we are doing as parents and learn some new technics as well.
One thing I've learned is not to punish, but to give a consequence. When one of my son's lie to me, I tell them, "Wow! That's a great made-up story! Go grab your notebook and write it all down and share it with the family at dinner tonight!"
We don't like lying, but when you get angry over a lie, it shows to the child that the lie is powerful. We give big kudos when the truth is spoken because a child will repeat the behavior they get the most reaction from.
What's positive about a child who lies? They think fast, creative, good acting ability, smart, convincing, and knows right from wrong. These are good skills to have as an adult! If you are going to lie, put it down on paper! Maybe this kid will be a famous fiction writer someday!
Instead of focusing on the negative, Mark and I try to turn it into a positive. Speak life!
It was a great week last week! I feel energized and ready to keep going! Andrew keeps telling me, "Mom, you look fresh!" I love that!